Goodnight Moon

WOW. if you havn't seen the moon tonight, you're definitely missing out.
IT'S A HUGE HALO and if you look really close at the halo, it's a RAINBOW. it's simply breathtaking and so increadibly perplexing at the same time. for those of you who are missing it. here's a picture i found on the internet of not the one tonight but another one.
So, i was EXTREMELY confused and curious of how this happens, and luckily, my friend sent me a passage from google:
moon halos are caused by tiny ice crystals that have gathered twenty thousand feet above the ground, as thin, wispy clouds. These clouds are so thin, you might not notice them at night, if it weren’t for their effect on the moonlight. Incoming light rays from the moon are bent, or diffracted, by these ice crystals at an angle of 22 degrees. This means that in addition to the direct moonlight, you will also see diffracted moonlight in a circle 22 degrees away from the moon. This is about the distance of your fist, held at arm’s length. Like a rainbow, this halo can even be slightly colored; red on the inside, and blue on the outside.

so, just for you guys who were curious.

I think that this year has been a large sky year.
I didn't realize the extent of how amazing the sky could be until this year, i think. Often, I enjoy the sky, but this year has just been MAGNIFICENT. from meteor showers, to AMAZING sunrises and sunsets to this moon halo.
I'm simply speechless at God's amazing works and am constantly reminded that He's there. He's working his wonders in everything.

just a HADTO blog sort of subject.

love,
Heather

Yawn

Indulgences: icecream.(: polishing off that last bit of cookies and cream, plus some peanutbutter cup action, mini chocomint sandwiches, coffee haagendaz. (i was not joking when i said INDULGED.), a LOONGG drive to/from sandiego/carlsbad for a friend, running through the rain even though i had an umbrella, looking at fashionblogs, sitting in car trunks, recording ridiculous fb videos, washing my car in the rain, reading a buncha magazines, staying up ridiculously late MAKING CUPCAKE POPS. yay!,
Looking for: MY PARIS NECKLACE. WHERE. ARE. YOU. I MISSYOU., new clothes+a way to reinvent things i already got.
Listening to: friends on youtube, In Christ Alone, Moving Out, the quietness of just me and my thoughts while driving, DJ Earworm - United State of Pop 2009 (Blame It on the Pop), this (seen on friend's blog)
Love: actually getting some work done, project runway!, singing with friends, singing wildly and stupidly with friends in a car, looklet.com,
Desire: Rodarte crepe slip dress in either coral or black. IT'S FINALLY BACK IN STORES AFTER BEING SOLD OUT FOREVER. YESSS. THANKYOUUU.; possibly the rodarte leopard lace dress(inlove withthe bows in back), more wisdom, decisiveness, more individuality, less skepticism, SHOPPING, fashionable clothes, makeup/hair do-ing skills, doing unseen/unknown good deeds, new wardrobe for europe/college/the rest of senior year, to be a food connoisseur
Things want to do: Jason mraz concert?, vintage fashion expo?, world expo, LA street food fest, cupcake challenge, rose bowl flea market, the two remaining days of culture vulture, cook con amigos, some sorta vaca/roadtrip/funfilled 4 daypreidents weekend

NewYear'sResolution.
Yeah, I definitely failed. I think my newyear'sresolution will be to make realistic monthly/bimonthly goals to fulfill. probably starting February.
I'm thinking that February goal(s) will be 1.go to the gym at least once a week. 2.don't be later than 5 minutes late to hoeger's class/only be late once a week at most.

short vent.
check your sources. get your facts straight. don't judge based on what you hear. it drives me nuts when people believe 100% in the things they hear. ferreal.
Also: in disbelief that people ACTUALLY strategically scheme things out in their minds.

SECOND SEMESTER SENIOR YEAR. hello! Everyone's overly extremely excited and pumped! but, to be honest? i don't really feel any difference, nor think it's gna be THAT monumentally different. but WHOKNOWS.

So, at the moment. i'm reading an allure magazine. and it has a bunch of little one page articles which are quite interesting : "how to deal with difficult people" "how to rent better movies" "how to buy and serve cheese" the last one, especially caught my eye. the other day i was trying to decide what sort of cheese to put in a crepe, and i realized. i don't really know the taste/any sort of difference between cheeses, except for of course american, pepperjack, and blue. but those are so blazingly obvious that anyone could tell the difference. but i was really sad because i really want to be one of those food connisseurs that can taste what's in a dish and pick out everything. know what i'm saying? and then once you can taste every single ingredient, spice, herb, etc, and how it's all different or similar.. then you can taste it together in various combinations, and how each flavor contributes to the other and it all just becomes A SYMPHONY OF FLAVOR.
and it would also help in the learning to cook- process. (:

i am. so. CRAZY. EXCITED. OUT OF MY MIND. PEE IN MY PANTS. ECSTATIC for europe.
hi second semester, i'm going to be spending lots of time scrutinizing my sister's travel books, and researching the web, and just overall preparing for my trip. i want to go to europe with knowledge of things already and knowing DUDE THAT'S ____ AND IT __ AND ___. i just want to absorb as much of it's culture as i can while i'm over there. *sigh

I want to go shopping so incredibly badly. But, i'm uncertain what I want to buy. I realize that my closet has really random stuff. it also mainly consists of just a buncha boring t-shirts, and i'm not really in LOVE with anything. i want new clothes oh so badly. ESPECIALLY for europe, everyone in europe is so insanely fashionable, and i don't wanna go there with ugly clothes, nor do i want to enter college with ugly clothes. just sayin.
So, I'm pretty sure that I'm going against what i wrote in the last post about being less fashion obsessed. I'm PRETTY sure I let it consume me again. :[ hm. thinkathinkathink. i'm still unsure what to do about it.

God is truly insanely amazing and can do ANYTHING.
So, this might sound super stupid and insignificant, but MAN OH MAN. yesterday, I came home and randomly decided, i think i'm going to pray and read the bible. So, I did, then i took a LONG nap and woke up. went online, checked grades. WOAH. PAUSE. I CHECKED MY GRADES. AND WHAT I CAME TO FIND WAS THAT I HAD A 80 PERCENT IN CALC. what's so incredibly amazing about this is that i had a 66 percent before the final and such. A 66!! and based on the curve, i was pretty sure i was in the C/F range for the curve on the final. BUT. i got a b on the final! HOW IN THE WORLD. I'm positive that i guessed on over half the questions.. and there's just NO way that my grade could've raised that much. I really do think that it's because God had so much mercy on me. I know that i don't deserve this grade nor treatment from God, but for some reason, He knew how worried I was, and granted me this blessing. thank you.

wow this entry is not very interesting...and yet INCREDIBLY long.
so just now i was trying to think of what to write that would be atleast a TAD mind stimulating, a BIT interesting, or even a SMIDGE profound. and i came up with nothing. i've concluded that i truly think that i'm an extremely uninteresting person. LOl. seriously. I think i need to go experience more, read more, ____more, and just be more interesting. yup.(:

So, yesterday i went to lunch with my family and grandparents. and i noticed that my grandmother was wearing this leather vest. and i really really want it. funny, ey? isn't it weird that you take like grandma clothing and put it on a young person, and it instantly turns hipster. But.. on a old person it's just.. *shrug whatever? so that got me thinking, this is the prime age to be experimenting with clothes and fashion. cause when you're old, it doesn't really matter what you wear, it all just looks blah.

i like to read my old blog posts. lots of times, i read back and think "what . in. the. world!?". it's quite amusing seeing my ups and downs, my random blabbing, and how i don't make ANY sense at all, etc. Also, I realized that one single post is usually a compilation of MULTIPLE days/weeks,. I always seem to start a post, then liek save it and go back to it later then continue, stop, continue, then finally SOMETIME, post it.
REMINDER TO SELF IF I EVER READ THIS IN THE WAYY FUTURE. MAKE A WISH ON 11:11 11/11/11. (:

k, i'ma end this here cause it's just RIDICULOUSLY long, and I don't even think i'd read it. lol.
au revoir!
Heather

photocredit: yahoo images?, lifetime.com (CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT'S A POTATO SACK? ME NEITHER.)

A New Beginning

Indulgences: watching foodnetwork nonstop, looking at EVERY page of pretty foods(seriously. every. page.), eating rice(even though i'm not supposed to)
Looking for: my beloved "paris" necklace, a strong sense of myself
Love: this feeling, churchkids bonding, foodnetwork shows, travel channel, fineliving, interesting sermons, amazing mornings,
Desire: more discipline to exercise and get to things ontime, more understanding of God, more faith, harmonizing skills

HELLOOOO LOVELY BLOG.
SO. WOW. i feel like it's been a LONG time.
THINGS I WANT TO DISCUSS.
1.Church camp
2.New year
3.Wisdom teeth
4.First day back from school
5.Whatever comes to mind

HAPPY NEW YEAR!
SO. NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS. EVERY YEAR, i consistently make 1908u32409830341 goals and forget them INSTANTLY. So for this year, one of my resolutions is to actually follow through with at LEAST ONEEEEEE of my goals. These goals are to be determined later. By AT LEAST the end of this week. yes. (:
Wow, it's a new year. a new DECADE. Thinking over this past year has been quite a challenging task. I see many strugglings, difficulties, and darkish times. Although I do feel this way, I think the best thing for me to do is to look back and think of all the things that I am really thankful for, instead. A challenging task, but also one needed.

WISDOM TEETH. OUT. the lack of food is driving me insane. I just weighed myself today, and i weighed in at around 108. and this was AFTER i ate some food. before when i used to weigh myself i was around 112 ish. what the ridiculo. Once I can eat again, I will most likely definitely be gaining back that weight (and then some) in a blink. I think that may be the reason for my overbearing fatigue lately. Also the wisdom teeth are causing slight migraines. bleh. But i'm so thankful to the Lord that I didn't have much/any actual PAIN pain after the operation. thankyouthankyouthankyou.

Church camp. So, Before, i was EXTREMELY reluctant to go. but while there, i guess I really should've putten MORE effort into everything. But, i still reaped benefits. Usually when I go to church camp, i come back SO SPIRITUALLY high, and CRASH within a couple of days. But this time however, I think God made sure that I wasn't 100% recharged because He's trying to tell me that to reach that point, i truly need to spiritually cultivate at home. I do, though, slowly feel God's spirit subtly working within me. I feel so much more sensitive to things I say and do, and things that others say/do. (but often times, i do the wrong action and realize after. boo.) But yeah, I feel a lot better off now rather than before. But even though I feel more spiritual now, I feel so incredibly incompetent compared to others and ehh. I don't know. oh well. Trying to read the bible every morning so that God's word is floating around in my mind as my day goes, but it's quite difficult since I keep waking up SUPER late each day and already feel SUPER rushed AND end up being REALLY late to zero. bagh.
Today I was thinking about how God wants us to shine like stars and to have others see Jesus Christ in us. I consistently have troubles with this. Not only was i discouraged because of the occasional "Oh, I didn't know you were religious" comment, but also because of my lack of comprehension. What is it that's going to seperate me from others? What will it be that will make people go, wow. this girl is different from everyone else because of God? And to be honest, I think a large reason for my struggle with this, is that i don't really see this characteristic in others either. Everyone seems so similar. We all talk about the same things, indulge in the same things, etc. Because I feel like God wants me to be someone where... when a person meets me, they instantly can tell that I am different from others. ya know? Still tossing this around in my mind.

So, Monday morning rolls around. And I pull out of my garage and i see the most majestic sky i've seen ever. It was.. magical. Along the entire ride to school, i simply relished in God's wondrous works and i felt like i was in a magical world. Sadly, I didn't take a picture. but i became ECSTATIC when i saw that erika castillo posted pictures. thank youu. First day back from school was pretty unexciting. I felt really disconnected from friends since i've been like mia all winter break. But I guess i'm now slowly connecting again. It still feels pretty weird though.

I'm REALLY disliking the construction on Hawthorne... and how they like stripped down the road. when i drive over it, i simply cringe. it's like nails on a chalkboard. Driving over that unsmoothed bumpy gravel, it feels like i'm completely destroying my car/tires.

I'm absolutely DYING to try to make those cute cupcake pops. they're SO ADORABLE!

So, I've been reflecting on my fashion obsession. part of me thinks like, eeh it's alll good i like clothes, so what? But when i think about it, it probably really does harm my relationship with God. I constantly want more money to get more clothes, and iono it distracts my mind. I've been really struggling with trying to not care of my appearance and of fashion. But i've been feeling SO incredibly gross and hideous lately with ugly clothes and no makeup. But it's overwhelmingly difficult. And i'm unsure if i should find a happy medium, or completely get rid of it, i'm mainly uncertain because i don't think i'm capable of finding this happy medium. this one's gna need a LOTTTTTT of prayer.
Also, speaking of issues that are going to require a lot of prayer. family. my mom's side of the family to be specific. I have HUGE issues with them. It's come to the point where i'm pretty sure i don't even love them, or maybe even despise them. "...anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgement. Again, anyone who says to his brother, Raca (aramaic term of contempt), is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, 'You fool!' will be in danger of the fire of hell." Jesus Christ has made the sin of hate just as severe and equivalence to the sin of murder. And it's really difficult for my mind to wrap around the fact that I need to love my mother's side of the family, despite their nature.

So today had a more communicative talk with father. Thank you God, for you truly do listen to my prayers. When I thought that there was no hope for our relationship, you show me a small spark that promises hope for us.

I've been thinking, and I wished my purpose for things were for God. I wished I didn't want to pierce my ears or get tattos because God doesn't want me to change, alter, or pierce my body in any form(not because I just havn't/don't see the point). I wish I didn't want to smoke, do drugs, drink because for God I should be holy, seperated(not because i think it's stupid and gross). etc...

Alrighty, well, that's all for now. next post will be by the end of the week with resolutions posted(so that i can reread them and remind myself to follow through) (:
Au revoir,
Heather.

photocredit: Erika Castillo, bakerella.com